If you want the gravy…

…You've got to get the biscuits!


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THE FALLS Review – ****

The Falls title

This review was originally written and posted on August 29, 2014. Save for some minor re-editing, it is presented here verbatim.

Imagine a cinematic dictionary in 92 parts, dealing with a fictitious (so far) event, full of absurdities and the driest humor you could imagine, about a Violent Unexplained Event which affected 19 million people. Imagine that these people began to mutate, began to dream of water, became obsessed with birds in a thousand different ways that no one–yet–has been obsessed with them. Imagine that somewhere in the middle of all this is Tulse Luper.

And who is Tulse Luper? Don’t ask if you don’t have the time to hear the answer.

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Looking Forward to the Fall and My Awards Wishlist

Heading into the fall, we’ve got a lot to look forward to, film-wise. I’ve spent a lot of time going over what’s coming out, watching trailers, and weighing my options, and I’ve put together a list of what I think are the most exciting and important films of the coming months.

Some I can’t wait to see. Some I’m trepidatious about. Some I’m sure will be full of bad laughs. But I weigh them all here. And, at the end, as a bonus, I’ve put together my personal dream ballot for this year’s film awards; throughout the article, you’ll see my predictions for what I think I’ll likely nominate, or what I think stands a fighting chance of getting on.

Obviously, there’s at least one film every year – and usually more than one – that doesn’t measure up. But on the other hand, there’s usually a film or two that proves to be far better than I expected. So with that in mind, let’s take a trip through the next four months. (Apologies, by the way, if you have difficulties viewing this post on a mobile device; the sheer number of trailers may prove problematic.)

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The Films of 2017 in 150 Words or Less: Part I

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“$7.50 an hour!” “But he has a million dollar heart!”

I’ve seen far fewer films this year than in previous years; tight finances are partially to blame, and a comparative lack of “must-see” films hasn’t helped. But for the most part, I’ve been pretty lucky with the films I have seen, and so I offer my thoughts on the 22 films I haven’t already reviewed…

I have already made my feelings about The Book of Henry very clear indeed.

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Tizer Review


Whilst on a recent day-trip back to a former hometown of mine, I happened to stop in at a shop specializing in goods – mostly edible – from the British Isles. I wasn’t especially inclined to get anything until, in the cooler, I saw a brightly colored can of soda – a soda I’d never had before, and didn’t even know existed.

For $1.50 (though rather more than the native price of 49p; at present exchange rate that would be about 63¢), on a hot summer day as this was, the prospect was too tempting to resist. I bought a can and drank whiles sitting outside in the shade. The result is this review. From A.G. Barr plc, it’s the Great British Pop, Tizer!

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My Six-Month Film Awards: 2017

2017 Six Month Best Picture

Time flies when you’re having fun, and even if I haven’t been having as much fun as I’d hoped – I’ve only seen 19 films for this year so far, compared with 35 this time last year – it’s still hard to believe it’s already time for this year’s Six-Month Awards.

Because I’ve seen so few films, I considered not doing them, but was persuaded to otherwise; partially for consistency’s sake (thank you, Maggie!), and partially because I love doing these posts. So let’s see what we’ve got!

Picture:

  1. A Quiet Passion
  2. Kedi
  3. Wonder Woman
  4. Baby Driver
  5. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

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HAMLET (1948) Review – ***½

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“This is the tragedy of a man who could not make up his mind.” (Source)

The quintessential Shakespearean actor of his time, playing the quintessential Shakespearean character in the quintessential Shakespearean play—directing it as well, and adapting/heavily cutting the text? It’s hard to imagine a classier enterprise, and the Academy agreed, giving the film Best Picture and Olivier Best Actor, the only Shakespearean film and performance to be so honored.

But how does it hold up 70 years after the fact?

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THE BOOK OF HENRY Review – **

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If this isn’t the most misleading poster I’ve ever seen, it’s because the film itself is just as misleading.

The Book of Henry is certainly not a good film, but calling it a bad one doesn’t seem to fit; it falls short of the mark, but not in the way a truly bad film does. Rather, it fails to answer two vital questions—who is it for, and what is it about?—and it’s hard to imagine anyone being satisfied with the end result.

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