If you want the gravy…

…You've got to get the biscuits!


Proper Hop Soda Review

Haven’t done one of these in a while. I wasn’t even familiar with this soda, but I saw it for sale in a coffeeshop, and was intrigued enough to give it a go. After letting it chill for a few days, I decided it was time to enjoy it on top of a nice dinner and an underwhelming screening of Andrey Zvyagintsev’s Leviathan (pro tip: just see A Touch of Sin instead). So, from the hitherto unknown Proper Soda Co. out of Grand Rapids, Michigan, it’s Hop Soda!

Continue reading



Because I’m That Kind of an Asshole: Predicting My 5th Annual Film Awards

Will it be as good as this poster? (The reviews suggest it will.) (Source)

Will it be as good as this poster? (The reviews suggest it will.) (Source)

So what if we’re only 55 days into the new year?

So what if I’ve only seen two 2015-eligible films (and those two films are Jupiter Ascending and Old Fashioned)?

So what if the next awards are a full year away?

It’s never too early to start.

Continue reading

Leave a comment

87th Academy Awards Wrap-Up

This about sums it up. (Source)

This about sums it up. (Source)

Well, it’s over. And I’m glad.

The outcome was, in some respects, better than I anticipated. In a way, it was like last year: the best nominee for Best Picture beat the overrated juggernaut, and the tech awards were largely satisfactory, but the acting awards left me largely uninspired. That may be a result more of the predictability of the race than of how I actually feel about the winning performances, but in any case, it felt a bit lackluster.

The show itself didn’t help. Who the fuck wrote the jokes this year? I like Neil Patrick Harris a lot, but he had some terrible material here. That running gag about his predictions was agonizing, especially when he repeatedly dragged poor Octavia Spencer into it. Kudos to Robert Duvall for his complete indifference when NPH tried to pull him in. And that bit where he made David Oyelowo read that non sequitur about the remake of Annie…what the hell was that?

There was an unsettling amount of off-key racial and political humor throughout the night. The reason/treason jab at Edward Snowden. Sean Penn’s “green card” joke about Alejandro Iñárritu (some have played this off as a joke between former collaborators–it was still in damnably poor taste). The fat jokes made by NPH at both Spencer’s and Oprah’s expense. There was a lot to be embarrassed by.

And I didn’t even mention that bit with Idina Menzel and John Travolta. I’ll just remind of whatever the fuck he was wearing around his neck and leave it at that.

On the other hand, there were some excellent acceptance speeches (I’ll discuss those under the relevant categories), at least one of which outshone the film it won for. The “In Memoriam”, with the sketchy artwork, was actually quite a pleasant change of pace (though the omission of Joan Rivers ruffled more than a few feathers). Rosamund Pike called out Gone Girl‘s general snubbing on the red carpet, which I much appreciated. The bit with NPH in his underwear rather cleverly tied together homages to both Birdman and Whiplash. Lady Gaga’s Sound of Music medley was nicely sung (as far as my untrained ears could tell), even if it was decidedly gratuitous (and why not mention My Fair Lady, which won Best Picture 50 years ago?). And the Original Song performances were quite strong (well, I went to the bathroom during “Lost Stars” and zoned out during “Grateful”, but the other three were great).


So really, a pretty mixed bag overall. Let’s go over the winners, see how accurate my predictions were, and discuss.

Continue reading

Leave a comment

Final Oscar Predictions

Best Picture:

  • American Sniper
  • Birdman
  • Boyhood
  • The Grand Budapest Hotel
  • The Imitation Game
  • Selma
  • The Theory of Everything
  • Whiplash

It’s a tight race at this point. Birdman has all the guild awards. Boyhood has the Globe, BAFTA, and Critic’s Choice. Based on years past, that actually gives Birdman the edge, but Boyhood has been so roundly acclaimed it’s hard not to predict.

Then, last night, the Independent Spirit Awards gave Birdman Best Picture. And to me, that sealed the deal. If they didn’t pick Boyhood, the Academy isn’t likely to. The only hope for any other film is a split–but The Grand Budapest Hotel is the only possible result.

Will Win: Birdman

Could Win: Boyhood

Should Win: Birdman, Selma

Continue reading


My 4th Annual Film Awards: The Voters Speak!

Alejandro Jodorowsky, where have you been all my life?

I asked, and you answered.

A week ago, this little poll of mine positively exploded in popularity after I spread the word on social media, which led Arnaud Trouvé (aka CineCharlie) to inform none other than Brontis Jodorowsky that he was up for my award! Not only that, but Sr. Jodorowsky proceeded to share the poll on his Facebook–both in English AND Spanish–leading to a massive influx of votes, many from Chile, the result of which was the best day this blog has ever seen–beating my previous best day by nearly 4 to 1.

Sr. Jodorowsky’s graciousness in doing so is a gesture I will not soon forget. And I want to thank everyone who voted–this has been a success beyond anything I could have imagined. I can only hope those who made their first visit will become regular viewers.

And now, your choices.

Continue reading